If you’ve never observed the Feast of Saint Nicholas before, here’s my pitch to start today. First though, let’s hear the the Saint Nicholas Center’s compelling reason. Saint Nicholas “helps shift seasonal focus to giving rather than getting, need rather than greed. In a culture often marked by materialism and stress, Saint Nicholas challenges us to live out Matthew 25–to give food to the hungry, water to the thirsty, clothing to the naked, care to the sick, welcome to the stranger, and justice to the imprisoned.”
When my children were little, December 6th felt like a pause button during the chaos accompanying the first week of December each year. Some years later, they discovered oranges and chocolate coins in their shoes when they came downstairs for breakfast. Other years, we snuggled on the couch and watched VeggieTales: Saint Nicholas, a Story of Joyful Giving after school or created some Nicholas-themed craft. Every year included a new book at Saint Nicholas and a bottomless supply of hot chocolate as we read our entire collection.
My husband and I knew before having children that we would not be a Santa Claus household. As clergy, we both experienced children in our congregations who questioned God’s existence after discovering Santa’s. One child found me in my office on Sunday morning and asked, “If my parents lied to me about Santa, are they lying about God, too? I’ve never seen either one.” Not inviting Santa into our home was an easy decision, and then we had kids.
When our children were in preschool, I tried to neither confirm nor deny Santa’s existence, choosing instead to focus on Saint Nicholas and Jesus’ birth at Christmas. I didn’t want to lie, but I also didn’t want them “ruining Christmas” for other folks because of our personal decision. Our children knew that while Santa might visit friends’ homes, he doesn’t visit ours because we choose to buy presents for one another.
From the start, our binary-thinking, older child preferred Saint Nicholas to Santa Claus. The former was a real person from history who gave generously to those in need, while the whole concept of Santa made zero sense to him. Harder was his constant struggle to connect Saint Nicholas and the Incarnation. “If Santa Claus comes at Christmas and Santa looks like Saint Nicholas, then how are Saint Nicholas and Christmas related?” He asked this question in several ways for several years. Like most parenting responses, my answer varied as he got older. God gave us Christmas, not Santa Claus and not Saint Nicholas…Jesus came into the world as a gift for everyone, not just the blessed souls who made God’s nice list…God’s grace and unconditional love are beautiful things and something to be celebrated, which we do for the twelve full days of Christmas.
When he was four years old, he asked me to tell him the story of Saint Nicholas over and over and over again while Christmas shopping. He wondered aloud why we bought gifts for one another when Saint Nicholas gave gifts to people he did not know. “Shouldn’t we buy gifts for the poor instead of ourselves?” The next evening, I took him to see a classmate in a community theater production of Babes in Toyland, a movie I watched movie often as a kid but could no longer remember the plot. In the play, mean old Barnaby wants to cancel Christmas because Santa is sick. After all, if there is no Santa to deliver presents, then there cannot be Christmas. It was like watching a sweater I spent months knitting slowly unravel before my eyes. He had so many questions on the ride home.
The connection between God, Santa, and Nicholas is difficult for small children. As a parent, I strive to be both honest and age-appropriate in all conversations with my kids. Some ideas are just too nebulous, though. Thankfully when it comes to Nicholas, a lot of resources are available to help explain his life and connections with these other December events. This list of what makes Santa different from Nicholas would have been extremely helpful to have on hand a dozen years ago.
And because the folks at the Saint Nicholas Center know young children often listen best when their hands are engaged, they created a list of things to talk about while working on some Saint Nicholas projects. Some of the projects we enjoyed included painting Nicholas rocks, coloring this printout of Nicholas, then wrapping it around a toilet paper tube, and drawing our own versions of the saint.
My kids are now thirteen and fifteen years old, and the days of crafting together after school are distant memories. Nonetheless, our collection of Saint Nicholas books from previous years is displayed with the hope of reading them together over dinner tonight. No matter how old we are, we always need Saint Nichoal’s reminder to shift our seasonal focus to giving rather than getting, need rather than greed.
How does your family observe Saint Nicholas Day?
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