This is the time of year when many Episcopal clergy start reminding anyone who will listen how important it is to observe Advent. It normally sounds something like this: “Wait, it’s Advent. Make sure you experience the beauty of Advent before you rush into Christmas. It’s time to prepare for the birth of our Savior and no, we will not sing Joy to the World on Advent 3.” As an Episcopal priest, I participate in this song and dance every year. I preach about Advent themes. I scour the hymnal for Advent hymns that aren’t impossible to sing. I am married to another priest, so we even feel guilty decorating our home too soon.
There is a group in the church world that is referred to as the “Advent police.” They tend to ascend their Advent soap box at this time every year because they dread the “Christmas creep.” The Advent police are normally Episcopalians, Lutherans or maybe Roman Catholics. They are the people who fan themselves dramatically when they see a church with a Christmas tree up before the 4th Sunday of Advent. They quiver a little when they hear Christmas carols, even if it’s just coming out of someone’s car radio as they drive by the church on December 15th. The thing is, there is nothing that I have found in our prayer book stating we can’t have Christmas carols or decorations until after the 4th Sunday of Advent. However, it has become an unwritten rule and I confess—I am a little scared of the Advent police.
I understand it to an extent. There are important messages in Advent that we miss when we rush to the nativity scene to greet the baby Jesus and the Heavenly Host. Advent is a critical time of preparation. It’s a countercultural season calling us to slow down as the world moves around us in a frenzy. That’s all important. But this my friends is 2020. We are done with preparation. We did that in what seemed like a never- ending Lent. In fact, I am not sure it ever ended. We did that when we bought toilet paper, hand sanitizer, and canned food. We prepared. It’s been 8 months of preparation, anticipation, exhaustion, frustration, fear, and mourning. I’m done with seasons that want me to prepare, at least for now.
Normally my husband and I don’t allow Christmas decorations in our home until December 6th,, the Feast of Saint Nicholas. Not this year. My husband has been playing Christmas carols on his guitar for a month already and I am okay with that. We decorated the day after Thanksgiving and I felt no guilt. We will be more relaxed at church as well. Now, we won’t sing Christmas carols because congregational singing is safe, but we will hear music with hints of Christmas. Members of our choir will visit those who are homebound to sing carols while spaced out safely. We even put a candy cane in our Advent boxes for children! Why? Because we need a little cheer.
So watch your Christmas movies, attend outdoor light shows, wear your Christmas jewelry, listen to gobs of Christmas music. Let’s make the most of this Christmas cheer. Spread it through the month and into January. Spread it to all whom you know and some who you don’t. And if I go missing shortly after this article comes out, it’s probably because the Advent police have me. Send help and maybe even additional hot cocoa and twinkling lights to decorate my house.
How are you observing (or not observing) Advent this year?
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I agree that this year is no time to refrain from anything that spreads joy to people, especially when driving or walking around looking at Christmas lights is one of very few traditions that a lot of us will be able to carry forward this year. While we’re at it, I say leave the decorations up through Candlemas!
But my experience hasn’t quite been yours, Stephanie. The frantic, fear-based preparation that I was doing this spring and the white-knuckled waiting we’ve been doing since the kids came home and started attending school online is not the kind of soul-strengthening preparation and waiting that Advent brings. I feel like I need the internal Advent practices more than ever.
Advent has always been a time for people to pause, look at their lives, and turn back to the practices that draw them into God’s love. If I could remember them through my Covid-brain, I’d probably be able to count on two hands the number of times I’ve sat for my morning contemplative prayer time in any given month since spring. I need Advent to prepare not my house, but my heart, so that when Christmas arrives, I can fully sit in it and experience the joy with my whole heart.
But the trappings have always just been the trappings, and the kids need color and light, so by all means let’s get our houses festive whenever we can snatch the time to do it!
I’ve moved on from the Advent Police mentality of my upbringing because I was increasingly uncomfortable with the condemnation it represented. It’s just too hard to find common ground with someone, especially someone from beyond our circles, when your message is “No … Don’t …” or a self-righteous “We always wait …” Advent is an opportunity to reflect on why we need a savior, and what we hope that savior’s advent will bring. Justice, peace, and hope are pretty high on my list this year! But I also really need need joy and light. Some of my lights went up the weekend we transitioned from daylight savings time. I have large pillar candles on my Advent wreath because I burn them for several hours each night. And I’m enjoying Advent music and the Nutcracker. Let’s embrace all the practices in a way that shows the world that we’re centered in Jesus’ way of love.
Thank you so much for this. I have always felt that busting out the Christmas decorations and carols WAS one of the ways I lived into Advent. It elicits for me that feeling of making preparations. When I came to the Episcopal church, I was totally put off by the Advent police. My Christmas tree doesn’t mean I’m not living into the season of waiting and hope. And this year, especially, I need the twinkling lights and cheer of the holiday season. Bring on the tinsel and eggnog.
Thank you for this.
My dad – a high church Episcopal priest for 57 years – was the Captain of the Advent police! “Christmas BEGINS on December 25th!” So I have it deep in my (literal) DNA. But this year is so very different. I love seeing the lights on houses most of all.
I am such agreement with you . My dad was also a Priest ( Nashota House ) and we never strayed from the Christmas Eve tree decorations and midnight Mass . I put my tree up yesterday ( after zoom church)
Times change . I need a bit of joy right now . Also , I am following Advent Word daily .
Blessings to you and yours .
Dorothy – my dad was a Nashotah House graduate, too! What year was your dad? Mine finished in 1955, and in the early 60s he got an additional degree (Master of Sacred Theology) and our family spent several idyllic (for us kids) summers on the campus.
Hi Amy .
He was a late bloomer. He graduated in 1970. He had spent time in the aerospace industry after WWII and his calling came when he was in his 40’s . My brother and I spent time there also and my oldest som was baptized by the Dean !
Beautiful place 🙂
Sometimes waiting and being still is the work of Advent. God comes in the small, still moments and in simple, barren places. Glitz and celebrations are okay; so is the practice of waiting. All the coloured lights and singing help momentarily. In this transition time, I am embracing Advent and the work of getting ready. Now is the time. Have you seen the quiet splendour of the night sky recently – clear and awesome.
Tune up “We need a little Christmas” from the musical Mame!
I agree with your sentiments. This is the first time I have decorated early. I am praying without ceasing, playing Christmas music and reading three daily Advent devotionals from different sources. I was inspired by the first Sunday of Advent/hope. Blessings to you and your family. My husband is a retired Anglican priest and I know how stressful and tiring this season can be. Thank you for your article.😊
I am so grateful for this article this morning (as we prepare to get our Christmas tree nearly two weeks before we normally do). I’m seeking the light of Christ so deeply this year, and perhaps this year, the light will be found in our strands of colored lights on the tree on December 4th. Thank you.
Sorry – this year is why Advent is even more important. And the advent hymns are beautiful and worth learning and singing. Their texts offer rich gifts, especially now.
As for me and my house, we will keep advent.
You don’t need to apologize. If that is what you want to do, that is what you should do.